The mind is an interesting and confusing thing. This mechanism called denial is difficult to understand. People seem to have this uncanny ability to not see what they don’t want to see, and only see what they chose to see. I know it sounds confusing, but that is because denial is confusing.
Because I have lived too many years of my life with and around addicts as well as people who have an illogical logic you would think I would understand how the process works. I don’t!
I mean truth is truth, even for those who say there is no such thing as absolute truth, by saying they are sure there is no such thing as absolute truth they prove it does indeed exist. You cannot say there is no such thing and in the same logic say you absolutely believe it to be true! Get my point?
OK back to truth and illogical logic. Logic tells you that using drugs or drinking and driving is dangerous and can lead to a path of bondage, addiction, jail and even death.
Illogical logic says that only holds true for “other” people. And you are the exception. If I had a quarter for every time I have heard someone say, “I can stop any time I want.” I’d be rich. I was going to say if I had a penny for ever time but in today’s economy that wouldn’t make sense. J
I am using addiction as the example because addicts are famous for being illogically logical. I have watched this season of Celebrity Rehab and every week - I listen to what Dr. Drew tells his patients, most still just don’t seem to “get it”. What really astounds me is watching an addict in denial watching a show like Celebrity Rehab or Intervention and making comments about how messed up those people are, never being able to see that a whole lot of their behavior is the same!
But the same form of denial and illogical thinking holds true for many things in a person’s life.
The alcoholic who says they are not an alcoholic because they are not homeless and out on the streets. They manage to hold on to a job or they are not getting completely wasted every single day, therefore there is no problem. Yet every time they drink they lose control and wreak havoc in the lives of those around them. It makes no sense to me why someone would keep doing the very thing that is causing the problem. Illogical!
Logic says if you have gotten more than one DUI you have a problem.
Again I am astounded at people who have gotten more than one DUI and then think nothing of drinking and driving again. Or worse someone who gets high on some other substance and illogically tells him or herself it’s different and OK to do because it’s not “drinking and driving.”
Logic says lying is wrong and if you lie- people will begin to distrust you not believe you even if you might be telling the truth. Illogical logic cries, “Why don’t you believe me- just because I have lied a few times (or more than a few times) before? You should still believe me now.”
Denial is simply illogical logic. Saying another person is bad because they do something when you yourself are doing the same thing is denial. Minimizing your own actions because they are YOUR actions is denial. Acting as if you are being persecuted or accused of something unfairly when in fact you are doing that very thing is completely illogical.
I know your probably thinking what IS she rambling about? I look around me and see the state of our society and it scares me!
I see kids today having no respect for authority or for adults in general. People refuse to accept responsibility for their own actions.
When there are consequences for wrong doing or making bad choices - people blame it on everything but their own foolish choice. It was the horrible childhood, it was a bad break, it was the spouse, and it was just bad luck. Someone spills a hot cup of coffee on themselves and it’s the restaurants fault.
A child lies, disobeys, disrespects or whatever and then when there are negative consequences it has nothing to do with their behavior it’s all just because the parent, the teacher, the police are being unfair or are out to get them.
A person gets a DUI and it’s not because they were drunk- it was because the Cop was being a jerk. Of course it didn’t have anything to do with the fact you were in fact driving while drunk.
The husband or wife who loses their family because they continue to use drugs, or drink or cheat or be abusive - But it’s not their fault, the spouse or family just didn’t love them unconditionally or were not supportive or made them mad.
A parent lies, and then doesn’t understand it when their child lies. Logic tells us children learn what they live! They learn by example not what you tell them.
Then there is general illogical logic. Example - faith to me means you trust God in everything and knowing He will take care of you no matter what is going on. Faith is trusting regardless of what it looks like. When I tried to explain this to a couple of people; one who is no longer in my life, their reply was, “So what you are saying is I can just walk out into the street in front of a speeding car and God will protect me. “ My reply is - Really does that sound logical to you?
If you deliberately walk out in front of a speeding car you’re going to get clobbered! God himself tells us there are consequences to foolish choices. Actually now that I think about it, that kind of explains their rational when it comes to some of their choices!
The one who is no longer in my life, continued to use drugs, but because they were prescription drugs it was OK. Add some alcohol and some weed to the mix also. Knowing this behavior is dangerous is pretty much the same as throwing yourself in front of a moving car and expecting God to keep you from getting run over!
But that’s not faith, that’s foolishness! And it’s testing God which we are NOT supposed to do. If something is wrong it is wrong no matter whom you are. If something is dangerous it is dangerous no matter whom you are! That is Logic! Illogical logic says you are the exception to the rules.
There is a saying common in addiction programs; it says “to continue to do the same thing over and over expecting different results is insanity!” And that does not hold true for addiction alone.
Again I just don't get it, I don't understand and it is in all honesty making me crazy! Maybe I am the crazy one? Hmmmmm.....Nope...I don't think so!
1 comment:
Mrs. Woods we are kindred. This exemplary post scriptural so speaks to me. I honor you. Continued blessings and faith, for you are truly genuinely unique. Saludt.
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